Andy Lazris
Professional Song Reviews:
Set Me Free
The CNN
Wrap Up
What Will They Think Of Us
COVID Is Coming
The Nanny Generation
Falling Apart
School's Out
Beautiful Girl
Epidemiologist
The Number Song
Just Wear Mask
Mask Island
Set me free
When I want a ray of sunshine, and warm raindrops on my back.
Don’t tell me to keep quiet, feed me pills, and give me flack.
Sure, my life is always treacherous, a fall mean my death.
But in the few years I got remaining, I won’t let masks block my last breaths.
Set me free
Free to be who I want to be
Free to sail across the treacherous sea,
Of getting older.
I am me
Let me be who I want to be
Stop trying to shackle me
Just set me free.
I know you love me honey, but I’m and adult not a baby
I don’t need more chains and drugs, all I want is love and hugs.
You lock me in a box with only CNN and Fox,
And throw away the key, so you don’t worry about me.
But what you don’t know is the fire that rages in my soul,
And neither you or this damned virus, can quench my will to go!
Because I am free!
Free to go take my chances,
Hug my friends, go to dances
Without you scaring me
Let me be
Please don’t be so glum
I may be old but I’m not dumb.
So let me be!
I know that risk is everywhere, that my fate is always hazy
Throughout my life I have always faced it, so why now do you drive me crazy?
I want to see my grandkids playing, soccer in the park.
This stupid little virus seems to be the world’s monarch.
I refuse to remain stuck, in your self-imposed muck,
Until CNN lets you feel safe enough to unlatch my rooms lock.
Because I am me!
I want to go out to dinner,
So I don’t get frail and thinner
Without a mask choking me.
Let me be free
My life may never be fail-safe
But don’t lock me in your safe
And throw away the key.
You can look at all the numbers, and fall deep into a slumber,
But the fact is that this virus, is nothing new to us.
We’ve faced much bigger dangers, but by making me a stranger
The only thing you’re doing is turning my old hide to rust.
It’s true, I could die tomorrow, but I can’t live with all this sorrow
That your overbearing fear, is igniting in my soul.
I say to CNN, go social distance all your friends,
But leave me the heck alone, to live my life until the end.
Because I am free!
Free to live my life as I want it to be!
Free of drugs, free of doctors, and not tossed in your locker
To satisfy your own insanity!
I want out of this jail cell,
Take your fears and your alarm bells
And let me be.
I could be dead tomorrow, let me live today in joy,
That’s my final plea to you, to my daughter and my boy.
Come give me a big hug, don’t smother me with drugs,
Discard the mask and fear; all I want is a big dose of your love.
Set me free
Free to be who I want to be
Free to sail across the treacherous sea,
Of getting older.
I am me
Let me be who I want to be
Stop trying to shackle me
Please just let me be!
The CNN Wrap Up
Mary Lou: CNN is the world to me, all day gloom I got to see
Every second there is breaking news, scientists saying we’ll all be screwed
It’s a Biblical disaster, keep your eyes glued
To Wolf, Jake and Anderson’s apocalypse crew
We’ll interview folks who agree with us,
Mock those who like to question stuff.
We specialize in COVID tragedy,
It’s breaking news, and it’s all for free.
All: We’re singing the CNN blues,
We twist your mind and feed you our views.
We make you so scared that your butt will be glued,
To our hand-picked experts who light the world’s fuse.
Mary Lou: But what about other scary lines?
That don’t fit into our COVID shrine?
There’s so much suffering we hate to ignore,
It’s our business model to show you lots of gore.
When you drink up COVID on prime time,
We got breaking news on channels two through nine
CNN two will give you a whack
John King talks about heart attacks
Three thousand daily deaths from heart disease,
That’s a lot of tearful drama for you to see.
Doctors show stats and scare you to shit;
Folks, you won’t get enough of it,
So if you want more misery,
Erin Burnett will greet you on CNN three.
Fifteen-hundred daily deaths from smoking too much,
Stories fill the airways like a Salem puff,
We can talk about prevention, but that’s such fluff.
We just show the horror, so much to discuss.
All: We’re singing the CNN blues,
We twist your mind and feed you our views.
We make you so scared that your butt will be glued,
To our hand-picked experts who light the world’s fuse.
Mary Lou: CNN four is worth a petrified look,
It’s anchored by a Baldwin whose name is Brooke,
Suicides, crashes and gun deaths galore,
Over three hundred a day, that’s hard to ignore.
A lot of young folks whose stories are grim.
We’ll show you each one, there’s nothing we’ll trim.
CNN five is a frightening promo,
Hosted by Gov’s brother, the humble Chris Cuomo,
He shows death than you may want to see,
When he tracks those who die of obesity,
At a thousand a day, that’s a lot of TV
McDonalds and coke buys us an Emmy.
All: We’re singing the CNN blues,
We twist your mind and feed you our views.
We make you so scared that your butt will be glued,
To our hand-picked experts who light the world’s fuse.
Mary Lou: CNN six takes the hospital’s direction.
A thousand deaths a day from mistakes and infection,
Lots more stuff on seven, eight, and nine
A starvation, disease and infection gold mine.
At least twenty-thousand die from these every day,
It’s true that most of it’s not in the U.S of A.
So on channel one we’ll have the COVID deaths flowing.
That will our keep audience still growing.
Don’t worry, we won’t let this virus go away.
Sit down America, live the CNN way!
What Will They Think of Us
What will they think of us, the generations to arise?
What will they write of us, other than we were not wise?
We led the world to ruin, as we hid behind our masks.
Our scientists and leaders, caused our society to crash.
For most people on the planet, this was safer than the flu,
But we shamed and scared and lied and preached, as zealots always do.
Refrain from Geri-girls: On and on they fill our baskets with their deceptions and their lies, on and on they count their numbers and don’t hear our anguished cries.
What will they say of us, all our daughters and our sons,
Will they all pray for us, for the damage that we’ve done?
Our leaders and the media, made this virus more severe.
We shackled all our children, although they had no much to fear
We morphed a viral outbreak into a catastrophic plague,
We closed down our society, what an error we had made!
We had an opportunity, to show the good science can be.
All Fauci and his pals could say, was wear a mask and watch TV.
Refrain from Geri-girls: On and on they fill our baskets with their deceptions and their lies, on and on they count their numbers and don’t hear our anguished cries.
What will they sing of us, When it’s time to write their songs,
What will their novels say, other than we were so wrong?
We cared not about people, how their lives were all destroyed,
Not focusing on the vulnerable, making safe ones paranoid.
We led people down a dangerous road paved with our deceit,
We kept talking about numbers, always pushing up the heat.
If anyone dared question it, they were shamed and shoved aside.
Either you listened to what Fauci said, or you were blamed for
those who died.
Refrain from Geri-girls: On and on they fill our baskets with their deceptions and their lies, on and on they count their numbers and don’t hear our anguished cries.
What will they think of us, when they assess our myth and lore.
We caused most of the damage, from our misguided thoughtless cure.
By telling us we’re all at risk, that society must close
Our scientists and leaders, became science’s greatest foes.
We convinced ourselves that we had no choice, but to listen and obey,
We could have done so much more for this, in a scientific way.
They told us we were dying and refused face the facts,
That the deaths that they were causing, were from the people who were trapped.
Fauci and his cohorts lacked any common sense,
They sounded arrogant and ignorant, just like Trump and Pence,
The doctors and our leaders, in whom we put our trust,
All drowned us in their tales and lies, and turned our world to dust.
What will they think of us?
COVID Is Coming
All: It’s coming, it’s coming
Let’s hide, cause it’s coming,
The reaper is strumming, hide out while you can!
Mary Lou: COVID is coming, to take over our land
But Fauci will stop it, he’ll boop it and bop it,
And kick it in the can.
We’ll close all the schools down, and wear masks just like the klan,
We’ll stand six feet apart, and watch where we fart,
Don’t go to the gym, and make sure not to swim,
Because his science is truthful, and defiance is sinful,
We’re just so glad, that Fauci has a plan!
Particles swim in the air each day, ready to attack us,
When runners go by they hit us with spray, so grab a tree and back up,
At six feet you’re safe, but at five you’re prey, so make sure to bring a ruler,
Parks aren’t safe, wear gloves when you walk,
If you must be with family make sure not to talk.
We’re just go glad, old Fauci has a plan!
All: It’s coming, it’s coming.
Look there, COVID’s coming.
Quick, hide, and start running,
Before the particles all land!
Mary Lou: COVID is coming, to try to take our land,
But Fauci will stop it, he’ll boop it and bop it,
And kick it in the can.
Just hide in your houses, and turn on CNN,
Wear masks in the bathroom, Don’t talk to your friends,
Keep kids out of school, and beware grandpop’s drool,
If you’re having fun, then you’re being real dumb,
Thank the Lord, that Fauci has a plan!
If you don’t follow the script, best to think again
‘Cause your neighbors will all shame you.
Some say we should test and live our lives again,
But Fauci says that’s not true.
We wear masks and comply but old folks still die,
These facts should not deter us.
Just do what they say, and all will be well,
Ignore all the people whose lives are now hell
And thank the Lord, that Fauci has a plan!
The Nanny Generation
Mary Lou: My folks are the greatest generation, They saved the world from devastation,
But in us they got an abomination. That left them all with agitation
We’re the nanny generation, we cause everyone indigestion,
Cause we want to control the situation, and squelch any deviation.
Do what I say, say what I do, I’m watching you, I’m watching you.
Mrs Peacock: I got cameras and snitches to know what mom’s thinking, and if she eats the wrong food she gets a verbal licking, I say go to the doctor, take all your pills, Your driving days are done, I don’t want you killed. Stay in your house, don’t fall or walk far, if this virus don’t kill you, you’ll be hit by a car. You should thank me for being, so caring and giving, and if you ever talk back, you’ll be in assisted living.
Mary Lou and Geraldine: We’re the nanny generation, We will script the conversation
So we can control the situation, and take away other iterations
We demand absolute devotion, even if it robs folks of salvation.
Do what I say, say what I do, I’m watching you, I’m watching you.
Mrs. Cowen: If you think I’m too harsh, you should talk to my son, I look at his grades with the rise of the sun, if he slips just a bit I get him a tutor, when he’s out with his friends, I track him on the computer. I go to each game and tell him to try harder, I get him a coach and wish he were smarter, then I tell him he owes me for being such a good mom, and that he needs to listen to me cause the world’s a time bomb!
Mary Lou and Geraldine: We’re the frightened generation, we don’t want bad stuff in our nation
If there’s a dangerous situation, we encourage abdication
Of all freedom and salvation, because fear is our main vocation
Do what they say, say what they do, COVID’s coming, we’re gonna hide from you!
Mr. Lassaro and Mrs. Eileen: We listen to science, and we think we’re all that, we take their advice and then we chit chat, with all of our friends, and we mock all the rest, hell if it’s spoken by Fauci it must be the best. We wear masks everywhere, even in bed, and when we see one who don’t, we say, “Yo, egghead, you must be for Trump, cause if you don’t do what we say, then you’re just a fool, there ain’t no other way.”
All: We’re the worst generation, when we hit a tough situation
We let them close down our nation, and invite pure devastation
Even if it causes mass starvation, and humanity’s castration,
We will ignore all our education, because all we feel is mortification
Do what they say, say what they do, we’re scared of life,
We submit to you!
Falling Apart
I am falling apart!
I’m going crazy, crazy, crazy.
Falling apart!
Who’s gonna save me, save me, save me?
Falling apart!
I’m feeling helpless, helpless, helpless.
Falling apart!
Please someone help us, help us, help us!
Masks and fear are wrapped around my neck
And i don’t know how to get away from it.
Wherever I turn it blows right in my face
Like a gale force wind that just won’t go away
They say, its coming strong,
Stay inside, and just put Jake Tapper on
That’s why I’m
Falling apart
(repeat main theme)
They say its ok if i stay in state, even if i go somewhere where things are not so great,
But if i dare to wander across state lines, then i am damaged goods and have to quarantine.
The sense it makes, is none at all,
But such is life in our scientific world,
Because I’m
Falling apart (repeat main theme)
Masks and distancing is all they got,
They only care about all our infected snot,
No sports, no school, no hugs, no glee
They suck my life away, and say they’re saving me.
Who said, they can,
Control the very fate of man?
That’s why I’m
Falling apart (repeat main theme)
What we live in is a zombie film, except it was our choice to swallow Fauci’s pill.
We simply buy what all the doctors say,
Even as they lock us up and toss the key away.
How dumb, are we,
To embrace this self-created tyranny?
That’s why I’m
Falling apart (repeat main theme)
This virus is one thing in a world of shit, Why do we cower in fear and then blindly submit?
Each day brings illness that we must surmount , why then is this the only thing that we seem to count?
Its time, to fight
To toss the god damned masks and party through the night!
So i’m not
Falling apart (main theme big ending)
School’s Out
All: School’s out and if you want to know why, the mayor will sing you his tune.
School’s out and there’s no reason to cry, your kids will learn from cartoons.
School’s out, you may think it’s dumb, but we’re saving the world to keep your kids dumber,
We’re keeping kids safe, and teachers safe too, facts be damned, it’s what we gotta do.
We ain’t being stupid, we’re thinking real smartly, while the kids watch tv, it’s time for you to party!
School’s out, enjoy it girl, it’s not our problem if the kids become fools.
Geraldine: Next year it supposed to snow.
All: Close it!
Ms. Peacock: Next year I hurt my toe.
Close it!
Ms. Lopez: Next year I don’t want to go.
Close it!
Geraldine: Next year the traffic’s slow.
Close it!
Mayor (Mary Lou): Just close school, the kids don’t mind, they’ll thank us when they’re old, for being so kind.
It’s dangerous out there, just driving to work, so it’s better to party so we don’t get hurt!
Ms. Eileen: We got kids to teach, we can’t be lazy.
Mary Lou: Shut your mouth girl, you’re driving us crazy.
Ms. Eileen: But that’s my job, I teach the kids, I impart them with stuff they need to live. They can’t learn lessons from a distant tv, they have to be immersed in school with me. They learn from each other, including lessons of life, this virus isn’t dangerous to them, we’re not being nice. If we’re this stupid and so damned cold, how will all our kids learn to be smart and bold?
Mary Lou: Hey girl, I’m saying shut your mouth, COVID is the only thing we should care about. You seem all taken by truth and facts, well girl you best shut up, it’s ok if they get fat, sitting on their butts and learning our lessons, and memorizing stuff like a religious blessing, they don’t got to learn, they just got to listen, and the governor’s smart, he ain’t pissing, out crap, it’s science, that’s what it is, it may not all be true but what gospel is? We don’t want no trouble, just leave us alone, all we’re asking is to keep the damned kids home. So girl, relax, stay safe, have fun. We’re keeping kids safe; enjoy it, hon!
All: School’s out and if you want to know why, the mayor will sing you his tune.
School’s out and there’s no reason to cry, your kids will learn from cartoons,
School’s out, you may think it’s dumb, but we’re saving the world to keep your kids dumber,
We’re keeping kids safe, and teachers safe too, facts be damned, it’s what we gotta do.
We ain’t being stupid, we’re thinking real smartly, while the kids watch tv, it’s time for you to party!
School’s out, enjoy it girl, it’s not our problem if the kids become fools.
Ms. Peacock and Lopez: Even Fauci says the kids can go back, the CDC says it’s safe, they site real facts.
Mary Lou: Well it ain’t what he said, yesterday, and who knows what tomorrow that guy may say. So it’s best to stay safe, talk on the phone, teach them through zoom from your vacation home, go to the mall, be with your friends, but God knows girl, teaching would be the end, of all of mankind, that’s what they say, and all of you who fight us, we’ll put you away. We’re in charge now, and you’ll do what we say, we got science on our side, it’s the only way!
Geraldine: What about all the kids playing sports, doing their plays, debating their retorts? What about friendships and kid romances, what about games and high school dances? How can we take that all away when there’s just no facts to make us think this way?
Mary Lou: Forget your speeches, I’m getting real tired, you open your mouth and we’ll make sure you’re fired. Don’t quote all your facts, just stick with the fear, and yea, we can do this almost any year. It’s a good thing, girl, so you and your friends, you needs to best shut up and have your back-talk end.
Geraldine: Next year it supposed to snow.
Close it!
Ms. Peacock: Next year I hurt my toe.
Close it!
Ms. Lopez: Next year I don’t want to go.
Close it!
Geraldine: Next year the traffic’s slow.
Close it!
Mary Lou: Just close school, the kids don’t mind, the world will thank us, for being so kind,
It may make no sense, but when does that count? All we go to know is that, school’s out!
Beautiful Girl
Beautiful girl, Feathers unfurled
Flying so high through the blue cloudless sky, I long for you.
Wings long that flow, a sweet yellow glow,
Shing so bright though a dark stormy night, I dream of you.
She’s my beautiful girl. And I long for her.
I reach up in the air, trying to find her.
I am stuck down here, on land that shackles me,
I seek to break out free, with my beautiful girl.
Ya da da, da, da, da, da, da da da da
La da da da da da da da.
Beautiful girl, beautiful girl
Don’t fly from me.
Ya da da, da, da, da, da, da da da da
Ba da da da da da da da.
Beautiful girl, beautiful girl
Fly down to me.
Beautiful girl, the light of my world,
Flying around, making no sound, does she notice me?
You’re trapped in the sky, as I’m chained and impearled,
Everyone trying to keep us apart, you belong to me.
Fly down and find me, so I can be with you,
And we can fly away, together forever.
We don’t need this world, let’s leave it far behind,
There’s so much love to find, with my beautiful girl.
Ya da da, da, da, da, da, da da da da
La da da da da da da da.
Beautiful girl, beautiful girl
Fly close to me.
Ya da da, da, da, da, da, da da da da
Ba da da da da da da da.
Beautiful girl, beautiful girl
You are all I see.
Beautiful girl, we are trapped in debris,
Nobody knows, that they must let us go, so you can be with me.
The rules and the myths, make us do that and this,
But all of it hurts, I need all your love, don’t fly from me!
Ignore what they say, there’s a better way,
I need to leap real high, and touch the sky, grab onto you.
Then we’ll soar up there, away from woe and care,
And we will fly away, in harmony, with my beautiful girl.
Ya da da, da, da, da, da, da da da da
La da da da da da da da.
Beautiful girl, beautiful girl
You’ll fly with me.
Ya da da, da, da, da, da, da da da da
Ba da da da da da da da.
Beautiful girl, beautiful girl
We own eternity.
Epidemiologist
Group: They come to us with questions, they come to us all scared.
They know we’re in the Ivy League, and are mentally prepared.
They know that we are scientists, ones of great repute.
We’ve written many articles, that only lesser men dispute.
So they ask us what to do, doctors, the world is now on fire,
How can we douse all the flames, please tell us, oh great sires!
They wonder what’s best policy, how do we stop the death?
They put my face on CNN, and I tell them in one breath,
Because I’m an,
Mary Lou: Epidemiologist, a bonafide smart scientist,
I put crap in computer discs, and you believe the stuff it spits,
Sure, facts may not agree with me, I dismiss all complexity,
From my basement room oh so dark, I make models in which the world takes heart.
My celebrity grows all the time, on CNN I make my climb,
The governors and newsmen too, upon my words their ears are glued.
The people give me such respect, they say to me, “Man, you’re the best.”
“You’re from Harvard, Yale, and Hopkins too, so how could we dare question you?”
I don’t care if the stuff I say, makes joy and pleasure go away,
I feed the people doom and shit, because I’m an epidemiologist!
Ms. Eileen: I’m a religious fundamentalist, a bonafide smart scientist,
For centuries I ran the land, and all the folks followed my command.
I tell the people that and this, that they can drop into a big abyss,
That witches live in all our towns, and Satan’s wrath is all around,
It’s proven fact the things I say, in fact there is no other way,
Unless you want to go to hell, do what I say and you’ll be swell.
Ms. Cowen: I’m a certified astrologist, a bonafide smart scientist,
I look at stars and tell you things, that have sincere and truthful rings,
I tell people that and this, that my visions can get them a kiss,
From some girl who they once dismissed, but who the stars now say will give them bliss.
It’s proven fact the things I say, in fact there’s no other way,
I’m not from Harvard, but that’s ok, the Harvard folks come to me each day.
Ms. Peacock and Lopez: I’m a racist anthropologist, a bonafide smart scientist,
I measure skulls and then calculate, to prove white men are really great,
I tell people that and this, that equality we must dismiss,
Because of, well, I have my reasons, that lots of folks are always believin’.
It’s proven fact the stuff I say, in fact there is no other way,
My science keeps white men in power, which they’ve enjoyed since the Mayflower.
Mr. Lassaro: I’m a prominent eugenicist, a bonafide smart scientist,
I ran our land for many years, my science tickled Hitler’s ears,
I tell the people that and this, that foreigners we must dismiss,
The courts believe all my crap, they said castrate the handicapped,
It’s proven facts the stuff I say, in fact there is no other way,
I controlled the whole damned Ivy League, and had power over the land and sea,
All: They come to us with questions, they come to us all scared.
Because we’re well-known thinkers, and are mentally prepared.
They know we’re great scientists, ones of great repute.
We’ve sanctified our dogma, that only lesser men dispute.
So they ask us what to do for them, the world is now on fire,
How can we put out the flames, please tell us, oh great sires!
They wonder what’s best policy, how do we stop the death,
They transmit our words across the land, and we tell them in one breath,
Mary Lou: Yes, I’m an epidemiologist, who claims to know that and this,
You’ve seen my type around before, we like to weave some fancy lore,
We say that we are scientists, but what we do’s prosperous,
We don’t solve problems though we pretend, we build models and portend,
That all the world is hit with doom, we scare folks from our basement rooms.
We think that all our made us strife, is all that counts, not people’s lives.
We’ll throw the world into a pit, like past historical hypocrites,
Yes, I’m an epidemiologist, the guy who turned the world to shit!
The Number Song
Sitting in our basements, farting out numbers,
Padding our Credentials, putting people in a slumber,
Creating mass confusion, all we do is scaring,
But all the people love us, think that we are caring,
COVID’s been a blessing, to science’s achievement,
Everyone’s confused, but there is general agreement,
That when we give them numbers they all like to play our game!
One, two, three, four. We love numbers.
When we feed them to people, they act much dumber, and
Five, six, seven, eight, they always listen
Cause a bunch of numbers scares them as they’re running and pissing.
We used to be geeks but now we’re loved and famous,
This virus made Anderson and Jake want to date us,
Nine, ten, eleven, twelve, it all comes down to numbers,
The more we cite statistics, no one cares when we always blunder.
We are scientists, so smart, so cool,
This virus is our savior and it makes us drool.
Since COVID came around we got out of obscurity,
It’s the best damned thing since Einstein’s relativity.
Thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, we like to party,
When Anderson thanks us we guzzle Bacardi,
We like to talk of numbers, of surges, of particles,
Of masks and distancing and all of our articles!
​
Just throw a lot of numbers out, projections, and theories,
We scare the shit out of people and make their lives dreary.
We like to see our faces on TV every night,
Telling everyone to hide from COVID’s vicious bite.
Seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, we seem so smart,
When we’re standing next to Trump and all the shit that he farts,
The Democrats love us, it may win them an election,
Though all of their mask laws will cancel their convention.
Masks, masks, masks and more social distancing,
It’s great not to think but still have people listening,
We made stuff up and ruined society,
But they’re making us heroes which got us notoriety!
So we give them more numbers and we scare them with surges,
And we tell not wearing masks is like committing murder,
We won’t let this die, even if our ignorance is killing,
Because science now rules, and we are all chilling.
One, two, three, four. We love numbers.
We seem so smart as they’re all getting dumber
Now that science is dogma and Fauci rules the land,
We can close down colleges and strike up the band.
We are smart and sexy men of science,
Hell, until the vaccine comes out, we demand compliance.
It’s never been better for guys like us.
I hope COVID’s here forever, so there’s no more to discuss!
Hurray for numbers!!
Just Wear Masks
The world came to us with a problem, that was riddling it real bad,
A plague was knocking on our doors, and people were really sad!
Our big brains and computers, turned to models on which we rely,
And we came to the conclusion, that lots of folks may die.
So we told that to the papers. We sat down and drank our tea,
We scratched our heads and locked ourselves, in the basement of the Ivy League.
For us to be the heroes, and to confront the growing fear.
We had to get a message out, and make it seem sincere.
So we sat around and pondered, but nothing useful hit our brains,
Until we had a eureka moment, and a new truth did we proclaim!
Just wear masks, da, da, da, da, da, da,da da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da
Love those masks, da, da, da, da, da, da
It gives us sass when you wear them, makes us seem real smart,
You think we’re like your heroes, and that we have a heart!
Masks are good, da, da, da, da, da, da,da da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da
Like Robin Hood, da, da, da, da, da, da,da da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da
You’ll be safe forever more, If you walk out the door,
Hell, we know that they don’t work, but it’s real appealing lore!
Just wears masks, lovely masks, they’re a blast!
We can’t be stuck on facts and such, when people want us acting tough.
They’ll put on masks and strut their stuff, and all feel good and safe enough.
Because they wear masks, da, da, da, da, da, da,da da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da
Designer masks, da, da, da, da, da, da,da da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da
They mock the ones not wearing them, and say they’re selfish jerks,Say their killing all humanity, that this is the only thing that works!So block your face, you’ll be safe, with a mask.
The world came to us with a problem, and we gave them what they want.
A simplistic solution, that even works in a restaurant.
Sure it doesn’t stop infection, the death rate hasn’t slowed.
But the people love doing it, because they think we’re in the know.
We feed them bogus studies, CNN shames all those with doubt
And all the world pretends its safer. Isn’t that what it’s all about?
Just wear masks, da, da, da, da, da, da,da da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da
Double masks, da, da, da, da, da, da,da da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da
You’ll think your safe out in the world, that you’ll never be impearled,
That you’re saving all humanity, while shaming those who don’t agree.
We love masks, it’s a blast, no questions asked!
Mask Island
God:
I got fire and brimstone and stuff like that
I got war and plagues and reverent crap
I toss so much trouble on the lap of the land,
And for this thing they have everything banned?
This little plague is what makes them self-remand?
How can it be so easy, to shut the planet down?
Am I not as powerful as that Fauci clown?
I’ve been answering their prayers, and they done nothing for me
But CNN says boo, and they’re hiding behind trees.
How can I just sit here and let it go this far?
Self-righteous folks control my earth, wearing masks inside their car. Sometimes I think of sending, masked zombies straight to hell, but I’m afraid my worthy counterpart, may not think that idea is swell
Satan:
If you think I will take them, you better think again
I don’t want do-gooders, to social distance in my den
They’ll make me wash my claws, and they’ll purell away my lyre
And they’ll complain all night, about COVID particles in my fires.
God and Satan:
How can we just sit here, and let them rule the earth? The humans need our help again, short of another virgin birth.
We’ve sent plagues down to earth before,
And ruined them with drought and war,
But how they’re scared of this one cold,
Beats all of that by at least ten fold.
They can build some islands, they got a lot of masks
It’s environmentally friendly, so we won’t take them to task.
They’ll send the worried well there, where they can play their games
And make the planet like it was, for us to reclaim.
Look what they’re doing, I think they heard our plea
They’re building the mask islands, and setting people free.
Let’s help in their endeavor, and send the crazy ones away,
And when the world is back to normal, you and I can play!
The crowds come out, with the mask boats. Transition music plays.
Half the crowd (the ones in charge):
Stupid, stupid, stupid, is what we’ve become.
We let the zealots control us as we sucked our thumbs
Who in the world could think it all made sense
Wearing flimsy cloth masks, led by Fauci and Pence?
We’ll send them an island,
An island made of masks,
They can shame us all day from real far away,
And order take out as their only task.
They sewed masks to their faces,
Chips to shock them when they’re close
They live in a room with CNN and their gloom
And dream of Fauci as they all doze.
The other half the crowd (the ones being banished):
Happy, happy, happy is what we’ll be
Taking mask-built boats across the glorious sea,
We can live a life of security,
Away from the COVID threat, pure serenity.
We’re going to an island,
An island made of masks,
We can’t wait until we get there,
It’s a social distancing blast.
We love our new existence
We’ll be safe as people die
We’ll be happy alone and read news on our phone
And feel secure as our lives fly by.
Both groups:
Crazy, crazy, crazy is what the world became Were we being smart, or were we just insane?With the islands built, and the shamers shamed And CNN mountain there to play its game.
Banished Group:
It’s all about prevention,So there’s no risk or chance,We’ll hover in our boxes all safe and sound,And we’ll do a virtual COVID-free dance.
Banishers:
It’s all about our freedom Which you relinquished in your gloom,Enjoy yourself out there, and just beware,There’s not COVID but there may be a typhoon.The background music is the “Happy, happy, happy” song as the two groups dance.
Doctor Paul:
How can there be nothing, nothing left to do People are still dying, I can save a million or two
How can there be nothing, i have to yell and scream
I can scare them with more models, make them self-quarantine.
The science is real clear here, I don’t want to hide
If they open society, they’ll commit homicide
I gave them all their numbers, COVID will put them in their grave,
Get me off this island, there are more lives to be saved.
Mary:
How can there be nothing, nothing left to do
They’re putting me away here, spreading lies that aren’t true.
How can there be nothing when the virus isn’t gone,
We need to let them know, that they’re oh so wrong.
Look at that man there, so defiant and so brave,
His eyes are filled with fire, Like me he’s not their slave
I want off this island, There are so many folks to shame,
I wonder if he’ll help me, that brave man with no name.
Doctor Paul:
Look at that girl there, she’s looking right at me.
Her eyes look quite pretty, from a safe distance of twenty feet,
Maybe she will help me, Together we can escape
Get off this masked island, and put doubters in their place
God and Satan:
It’s time we shoved our clout around, and put them away
All those self-righteous sycophants, who have nothing good to say
It’s us who writes the moral script, not Fauci and his clowns,
So begone to them, on the island they can frown.
We done real good, boy, we done real good.
We done went and cleaned up, our polluted neighborhood
We shoved them on their islands, they’re stuck and put away,
So boy, I have good news for you, now it’s time for us to play!
God and Satan sing “we done good” while Mary and Paul sing “Look a that man, look at that girl” and the chorus all sings:
Chorus
We’re loving our new islands
It makes everyone so pleased,
We can live our life filled with risk and strife,
While the righteous can all make believe.
So happy for the islands,
The islands made of masks,
They can avoid all pox, live their lives in a box,
And all the rest of us can be free!
God and Satan:
We done good boy
Mary and Paul:
It’s not over yet!